All in all, PlayStation All-Stars Battle Royale tries too hard to be something that it's not. The visuals and music are great, but that doesn't forgive the fact that the gameplay gets drawn out for too long due to the fact that the only way to knock out your opponent is with a finishing move. The game isn't great, but this doesn't automatically make it a bad game either. I enjoyed the time I had with it, but the novelty of the game started to wear thin after a while because it felt like it was desperately trying to be Smash Bros instead of trying to be its own thing. Overall, the game is pretty average, but that shouldn't stop you from playing it a few times in your life. But until then, I'll be seeing you.

Score:

Animal Crossing

Banjo-Kazooie

Bayonetta

BioShock

Castlevania

Chibi-Robo

Crash Bandicoot

Donkey Kong

Doom

Final Fantasy

Fire Emblem

F-Zero

Game & Watch

God of War

Golden Sun

Halo

Jak & Daxter

Katamari Damacy

Kid Icarus

Kirby

The Legend of Zelda

Mario Kart

Mario Party

Mass Effect

Mega Man

Metal Gear Solid

Metroid

Monster Hunter

Mortal Kombat

Mother/EarthBound

Okami

Pac-Man

Phoenix Wright

Pikmin

Pokemon

Professor Layton

Punch-Out!!

Ratchet & Clank

Rayman

Rhythm Heaven

Shantae

Sly Cooper

Sonic the Hedgehog

Spyro the Dragon

Star Fox

Super Mario Bros

Super Smash Bros

Tetris

Warioware

Yoshi's Island

Thanks once again for your continued support and I hope you all will still be reading my articles even after I reach 100. But until then, I'll be seeing you.

Ratchet & Clank is the recently released movie based on the 2002 game; Ratchet & Clank, it also has a tie-in game called Ratchet & Clank and is part of the long running Jak & Daxter series. Oh sorry, I mean Ratchet & Clank.

So admittedly this film has been out for a while now, I only got the chance to see it this Wednesday due to life getting in the way, which the exact same reason why I was only able to get this article out recently.

So a week ago I started out my √¢‚ǨÀúUpcoming Video Game Movies’ article by stating that Ratchet & Clank is the type of property that has great potential to make the transition to film. The fact that Insomniac Games and one of the official writers from the games was working on the project raised my interest and the inclusion of the actors from the games also showed to me that the film-makers were willing to cater to the wants of the fans by not sacrificing the personality that the canon voice actors have given them, presenting a project where all the pieces can be assembled into a film that encapsulates what people love about Ratchet & Clank and presenting it to a wider audience.

It blew.

Not only was the humour flat, the characters dull and the plot resembling the form curdled milk might take if it was being fingered by a Swiss man, but the action was oddly subdued. So be prepared as I eat my own words as I tell you why this film isn’t worth your time.

None of the action sequences in this film were exciting; there’s a bit where Ratchet flies around with a magnet to stop some robots, a bit where Ratchet and Co run away from some robots, and an underwhelming final battle. That’s it. The direction of the action is done in a way that everything seems slow; a far cry from the series origins where you can rush around making use of any weapons you have to defeat enemies. Speaking of which, the weapons are never given priority or focus upon in this film, they’re just there and could honestly have been replaced by anything. There’s a training montage and sometimes weapons are used in big set pieces, but it doesn’t add anything to the substance of the film and seems to just be there for fanservice.

“Oh but this is a film! And in your last article you said that films have to put more focus on plot and characters than games do!“

Yes, that is true Mr. Mysterious Speaking People’s Person. But R&C doesn’t do that right either.

So the plot. Chairman Drek is destroying and harvesting planets to rebuild his own one. The concept of a giant space station that blows up planets might be interesting if there weren’t three Star Wars movies with that exact same plot device. Ratchet wants to help the Galactic Rangers defeat Drek because he wants to be a hero, but he gets rejected by Captain Qwark. The problem with this is that it’s clear the writers were trying to make us empathise with Ratchet for being rejected, but at this point in the film, Ratchet has done precisely nothing heroic and has at worst tested my patience for waiting for something interesting to happen throughout the runtime. Then he meets a robot dubbed √¢‚ǨÀúClank’ who has information that might be useful in defeating Drek. And then the adventure happens. Eventually.

Yes, the plot has various issues, namely that it can’t decide on whether it wants to remain faithful to the source material or take the story in a new direction as this so-called √¢‚ǨÀúre-imagining’ attempts desperately to appeal to a new audience, failing to make that balance between fans of the original or new fans. The film doesn’t seem to know what it’s audience is either. As mentioned, the plot is largely based on the 2002 game and I believe it since the script reads like something conceived from that era. With obnoxious quips such as √¢‚ǨÀúSweet’, √¢‚ǨÀúWicked’ and other words that are being thrown about in a non-ironic context scattered throughout the film.

The underdeveloped characters and meandering story leave you bored while you watch the various colours flashing onscreen and questioning how close to the climax the film actually is. The film is only around 90 minutes long yet it feels so much longer since there is little to feel invested in, even the climax of the film involves protecting a planet we’ve never seen before and don’t care about since the stakes are so low, this is because apparently the last planet that Drek blew up was evacuated. As in Everyone got off on time. There’s a fine line between suspension of disbelief and pure Fantasy you know.

In the run-up to the release for this film you may have seen this video clip:

You may have noticed the annoying Qwark fanboy from this clip. He’s annoying. But you may have also noticed that Clank makes use of a speech recorded to call out Ratchet’s lie about being friends with the Rangers. A well written story would have used this as a √¢‚ǨÀúChekov’s Gun’ effect where this would be used later in the film for a different purpose, but it never has any effect on the film at all, nor does Ratchet’s lie put any strain on his relationship with Clank (I’ll go into some more detail about that later).

Indeed several elements such as the one mentioned appear throughout the film yet have no impact on the plot later on, the inverse it also true. You may have seen the use of the √¢‚ǨÀúSheepinator’ in several of the Trailers and TV Spots, this gun is retained from the games and is used to turn enemies into sheep, likely a piece of fanservice to appeal to its prior audience. Bad news, it appears a grand total of once in the entire film, is never mentioned before that point and is never used again, ultimately making the presence of a fantastic weapon in a story that otherwise wants to be taken seriously seem extremely out of place.

Speaking of fanservice, there are several nods to previous games in the series that feel extremely out of place. An example is when Qwark is using a computer and the start-up tune for the original PlayStation plays (Ratchet & Clank never appeared on the PS1 by the way, making me question why it was added); it’s extremely jarring and takes you out of the movie. Another example is when we see one of the rangers training using a game. Eagle eyed viewers will notice that game is clearly Ratchet & Clank 3 played in First-Person mode. What may have been intended as an innocent piece of fanservice will be really out of place to fans of the series and will probably make common viewers do a double take upon what they’re seeing.

The characterization is a mess as well. In the original 2002 game (I haven’t played the 2016 reboot game admittedly, for all intents and purposes I hear it's great), Ratchet was a loner and a jerk to pretty much everyone and had a dated late-90s surfer dude attitude. I never liked his characterisation in that game, but upon seeing this film I realise how important that characterisation was to the Character and the overall appeal to the series. 2016!Ratchet is presented as dorky wannabe hero who is clumsy but has a good heart, I know this because throughout the film several characters literally say he has a good heart.

Even though I don’t like 2002 Ratchet, I do acknowledge that his transition from abrasive jerkass to the lovable Hero of the sequels is a great factor to the Characters lasting appeal and personal strengths. 2016 Ratchet is presented as a bland hero who is not interesting enough to get invested in.

Clank’s role in the film is completely superfluous. Considering his name is in the bloody title of the film that’s a pretty big misstep. In the 2002 game, the relationship between the two title characters was a big part of the development and appeal of the game, one has to wonder why this important element was omitted from the film. The two leads barely interact with each other and even when they do there is no meaningful conversation between them.

The new characters that have been added to the film are a bunch of the most forgettable supporting roles I’ve ever seen. A group of heroes known as the Galactic Rangers have been re-imagined as a superhero team led by Captain Qwark for this iteration of the franchise; they are all boring and forgettable. I don’t remember a single thing about any of them. Not one.

Ratchet gets a mentor early in the film played by John Goodman, now I like John Goodman but his role is literally any generic mentor type character you can think of. Imagine Obi-Wan if he didn’t die and just told Luke to be good. That’s the role. What a complete waste of your John Goodman.

Chairman Drek returns as the chief baddie for the film, this time played by Paul Giamatti, now for what it’s worth, Giamatti probably gives one of the best performances in the film outside of Jim Ward as Qwark and David Kaye as Clank, he does seem like he’s having fun with his part for what it’s worth and he does encapsulate the characteristics of the villain fairly well. Drek’s motivations have changed this time round to make him slightly more sympathetic, whereas 2002 Drek was a complete monster through and through, I won’t fault the filmmakers for wanting to make him more sympathetic. Both incarnations of the character have their strengths and weaknesses.

Dr. Nefarious is in the film as well. They screwed up big time with this character, the Nefarious of the games in my opinion, is one of the funniest characters put in a game. Film Nefarious is incredibly boring. He does nothing funny in the film and his status as a Mad Scientist has been flanderized into a Jerk who just happens to be a scientist. How the hell do you make Dr Nefarious boring!? I can accept applying him into the story but if you’re gonna do that, then at least make him fun to watch!

And finally we have Captain Qwark. He betrays everyone. I hesitate to call this a spoiler since this happened in the original game as well, so I apologise for spoiling a 14 year old game for you. I won’t fault Jim Ward’s performance since he definitely knows the role he’s been playing for the past dozen years through and through. But his characterisation makes no sense.

In the 2002 game, Qwark was working with Drek from the start because Drek was sponsoring him and making him loads of money. 2016 Qwark betrays everyone about halfway through because he was jealous of Ratchet getting all the hero attention. That’s a bloody weak excuse. It doesn’t even make any sense why he stays with Drek until the Climax either, Qwark’s betrayal is uncovered by Ratchet who is captured by Drek’s forces, so instead of killing Ratchet, Drek decides to let him go because... I have no idea. Why doesn’t Drek just kill him? By letting Ratchet live, Qwark's betrayal becomes public, so why the hell would anyone accept him as a hero now? This makes no sense; why doesn’t he just turn Drek in there and then!? Their deal is broken!

A similar thing happens later on after Sylvester Stallone’s character (who is clearly phoning in his role) gets anticlimactically killed off, when one of Drek's lackeys ends up turning good for some inexplicable reason.

“Well aside from everything negative that has been stated prior to this point, is it at least funny?“

Nope. If they can’t even make Nefarious funny then what else is there? The aforementioned training montage involves lots of prat-falls and stuff going wrong, but it isn’t funny, There’s a running gag where Drek’s minions are seen texting their stereotypical Jewish-sounding mothers during his speeches, it isn’t funny though. I will admit that I did chuckle a few times at scenes that I have already forgotten, and the payoff for the unfunny texting gag was the one time in the entire film that I laughed out loud. But other than that, it fails in the humour department.

Animation-wise, there really is nothing spectacular about it, the animation is fine in most parts of the film, but the use of animation never factors into making anything more exciting, a competent film would have used the fluidity of animation to improve the direction of the action, but that never happens, Ratchet runs to this place and fires a gun. There are no non-stop action moments throughout this film, like the whole film is taking a breather from doing nothing.

Some things that are legitimately bad relating to the animation however; there’s a moment when a planet is destroyed and the debris looks like it was rendered in 2002. There’s an image of the President of Planet Whatever which looks unaltered from his appearance in Ratchet & Clank 3 way back in 2004! In all Crowd shots there are dozens of identical clones present, because apparently the phrase √¢‚ǨÀúVariety is the Spice of life’ just meant throw as much of the same thing into the product and hope that people don’t notice how bland everything tastes.

The soundtrack is forgettable as well.

So aside from the poor direction, clueless writing, boring plot, forgettable characters, mediocre animation, generic soundtrack, weak humour, average performances and awful dialogue, is there anything worth recommending in this film?

Nope.

Nothing about this film works. In my last article I stated that this film would likely be the best video game movie in years. Oh how wrong I was. It’s not completely awful, I don’t think that it will make anyone’s √¢‚ǨÀúWorst of’ lists, but as a film that had a lot of the crew behind the over the top zany action of the games behind it, it’s depressing to see how safe the film is trying to be, appealing to the lowest common denominator and offering little of substance in return, ultimately creating a boring and forgettable product that fails to do justice for the great game series it’s based on.

I also stated in my last article that the film would have to make its budget back quickly to avoid competition with Captain America 3. According to the-numbers.com the film, as of this writing has made around $8million on a $20million budget^[1][2] (although I question how much of that money was left over from the undisclosed budget of the game).

Nobody is interested in seeing this film. In fact the cinema I went to see this film at only had 3 showings a day (for a film which at the time hadn’t even been in cinemas for a week!) and there were a grand total of four people in the theatre: Me, my R&C-savvy friend (Who hated it even more than I did), some kid and her dad, and even they seemed bored by the film at the end of it all.

Somewhere among this 90 minute train ride of tedium and generic sci-fi slop is the film that I wanted to see, but what we ultimately have is a film with no ambition to be anything more than a promotion for a vastly superior game. And it feels very alien to me as well considering that this is the ONLY thing in the entire Ratchet & Clank franchise to receive universally negative reviews from critics (Yes, both those puns were deliberate).

So I guess Warcraft is the film that people are gonna be hyping as the first great video game movie (because I refuse to live in a future where people praise Angry Birds as a cinematic masterpiece), and for what it’s worth, Warcraft does have a good director behind it. Also considering how the upcoming Sly Cooper movie features the same Director and I was initially sceptical about that one, so I guess we can list that film as a premature dud.

Go watch Zootopia (yes, it’s still in Cinemas after all this time) or Captain America 3 instead as this film fails to do justice to the game franchise it’s based on or to entertainment as a whole. I myself will likely forget the entire film by the end of next week.

References:

[1] http://www.the-numbers.com/movie/Ratchet-and-Clank#tab=summary

[2] http://www.awn.com/animationworld/kevin-munroe-talks-ratchet-clank

Now each one of the first three Crash Bandicoot games are a very specific type of platforming game that I like to call "Tunnel Platformers," because they're basically what would happen if you placed the field of view behind the player's avatar instead of to the side of it (like in Super Mario Bros); This was partly what made Crash Bandicoot so unique. The other part were the numerous and humorous death animations. Luckily these gameplay focuses remain wholly intact, but with a new coat of paint and some minor tweaks and alterations were made here and there to bring the earlier games (1 & 2) closer in style to the later entries (2 & 3 respectively). With the exception of colored gems, you no longer have to do a perfect run of a stage in Crash 1 to get the level's gem. Also in Crash 1, bonus rounds don't permanently vanish after they're completed. In Crash 2, after you unlock your first secret stage entrance you can access it whenever you want by going to the warp room's basement. And finally, all games allow you to do time trials (with online leaderboards) and let you play as Crash's younger sister Coco (after you beat the first boss).

Now all of these additions are very nice indeed, but because this a full-on remake (from the ground up no less) and not a remastering like what the trend has become nowadays, there are bound to be a few things here and there that aren't exactly how they were in the originals. For instance: Crash's crawling speed is slightly reduced, there is a bit of control lag when getting from a standing pose into a crouch after walking or jumping, the ice physics are a bit slipperier than I remember, and Crash's hitbox is tiny bit bigger than what it used to be which makes getting past fire traps all the more difficult. All in all the problems that were fixed causes some new problems to arise thus keeping the games' difficulty around the same as what it used to be.

All in all my time with the game was a lucrative experience. It's not a perfect 1-to-1 recreation of the classic games, but this collection is a damn fine attempt. The gameplay physics are more or less exactly the same as I remember them, the new voice actors do a pretty good job at replicating the feel of the original characters' VA's with some even going above and beyond for selling the role they played, and the new features that were added to Crash 1 and 2 are a great way to breathe life back into a couple of games that were likely played to death. One could even say that this is the Super Mario All-Stars of the Crash Bandicoot franchise. All we need now is a classic Spyro the Dragon trilogy remake, but until then, I'll be seeing you.

Score

Cyberpunk 2077

I love me some good old-fashioned Sci-Fi, but if there is one thing that I need in order to get REALLY invested in it, it is aesthetic. Cue Cyberpunk 2077 by CD Projekt Red; when I first saw the game, I was not expecting an 80's punk rock style RPG mixed in with shooting elements. But in all honesty, I didn't know what to expect since this is my first experience with this game. If the immense praise that The Witcher 3 got is any indication of this game's quality, then I'm sure to pick this game up on day one, assuming I have the cash.

Kingdom Hearts III

The epic conclusion to one of the most beloved crossover game series of all time, Kingdom Hearts III by Square Enix and Disney is sure to sell like hotcakes. I have played a few games in this series and I've tried to make heads or tails of the overly convoluted plot, but to no avail. Hopefully this game will tie up some much needed loose ends so we can finally get the closure we've all been waiting for this January.

Starlink: Battle For Atlas

If any of you were hoping for anything to fill that Star Fox shaped void in your life, this game might be able to pull that off. Starlink from Ubisoft is an open-space adventure game mixed with Star Fox style dogfights and a toys-to-life-based vehicle customization, but thankfully the game does not require the use of the figures to unlock everything. They still look quite nice though and with the Switch version having Star Fox exclusive content, you might actually want to plunk down the $75 for the game's starter edition this October.

Cuphead: The Delicious Final Course

I LOVE Cuphead; everything from its gameplay, music, and art style has proven to me that classic animation is not dead. So imagine how elated I was when the trailer for the game's DLC dropped. The fact that we're getting a FULL new island with new weapons, bosses and a new playable character just shows that this game is a labor of love that deserves every dollar thrown at it. For me, 2019 can't come soon enough.

Sekiro: Shadows Die Twice

I may not be a big fan of the Dark Souls series, but I love Bloodborne. Yes its difficulty is more forgiving than Dark Souls, but I was more drawn in by the setting and atmosphere than anything else. To me, dark medieval fantasy has been played to death, so the Victorian era horror that Bloodborne offered was a breath of fresh air. Hopefully the feudal Japanese theme that Sekiro will offer will do the same thing that Bloodborne did for me, plus I'm really looking forward to using that multipurpose prosthetic limb that the main character has.

Devil May Cry 5

I have a confession to make: I have only really gotten into one game in this series, and it was the DMC reboot by Team Ninja Theory. I'm not sure what the general consensus is regarding that game, but I had a lot of fun playing it; it reminded me a lot of Bayonetta in its presentation. Now I know that Team Ninja Theory isn't working on the latest installment in this series, but considering how similar the gameplay looks I'm sure that I'll have just as much fun, if not more.

Spider-Man

This is a bit of a big hurdle for me. On the one hand it's Spider-Man; a comic book series that I have loved since I was a child, but on the other hand it's a licensed game; a mark that usually doesn't bode well with me as most licensed games never really do too well, but damn does this game look GOOD. Insomniac did a fantastic job in capturing the look and feel of the Spider-Man comics and the updated costumes of the villains in this game look amazing. I also love that the game has heavy stealth elements and the combat makes use of the environment. I may have to bite the bullet and buy this game because it is starting to make me think that maybe licensed games now have a chance at being genuinely good.

Babylon's Fall

Very little was shown about this game other than some of the game's backstory and the developer behind it, Platinum Games, but considering that Platinum is the same company that has given us Bayonetta, Vanquish, Nier: Automata, and The Wonderful 101, I am more than certain that this game will be a great, fast-paced, high-fantasy action game. I'll be sure to get this game day one as well, once again assuming I have the cash.

Doom Eternal

Doom 2016 was a great way to breathe life back into a mostly dead game genre, arcade style FPS, and now that the game is getting a sequel, I can only hope for one thing with the new entry: More of EVERYTHING. I want to see more weapons, more gore, more demon types, more locations, and most importantly more insanity. Only time will tell, but if the previous game is any indication, I could see the Doom Slayer getting revenge on Samuel Hayden for trapping him back in Hell.

Super Smash Bros Ultimate

As if this was even a surprise. I can't wait for this game and so far the only things we know about it is that it has over 65 characters, over 80 stages, every character from the previous 4 and half games will make a return plus Inkling, Daisy and Ridley, 8-Player smash will make a return, several characters had some major tweaks to their movesets, many final smashes were overhauled to speed up the fights, and some new items, pokemon and assist trophies will make their debut in this entry. Besides amiibo support, we don't even know anything about any side modes, collectibles, or single-player stuff and I'm STILL excited. December 7th will be marked on my calendar, and I will be waiting.

So that's my list. I am likely going to go broke in the coming year or so trying to get all of the games I'm most excited for, and I only listed my top 10 here; there are many more that were shown at E3 that are now on my wish list. I just hope I'll be able to at least get the ones listed here, but until then, I'll be seeing you.